Real Life Romance: Vincent Virga
I received this interview yesterday, I don't think dear Vincent knew it was the 5 years anniversary of my LiveJournal, but in any case it was a wonderful gift. I think the post you will read below is a piece of "history", the life of an author who made the history of Gay Literature on his own, but his influence is doubled by the fact he is the soul mate of James McCourt, the author Dennis Cooper described as "a true iconoclast, a devoted high stylist, and a holder of the unfashionable opinion that prose is a natural extrovert and beauty that deserves the brightest polish, the best accessories, the most extravagant costumes". I truly think this interview is way too much important for this blog, but Vincent Virga generously gave it to me, and I will greedily make it mine. I have often posted bios of very important LGBT people, but today I strongly recommend you to read this post, this is an original post you will not find anywhere else and I'm extremely proud to host Vincent Virga today, I think this is the best way to complete 5 years of blogging. I originally asked to Vincent to talk about his relationship with James, for my real life romance series, but I received way more than that.Thank you Vincent (and James) for being my guest today. As I told you when I asked for this interview, I’d like to focus on your real life happily ever after, i.e. on your relationship with James. I read you met James in 1964 when you were both attending Yale, but to introduce this moment, I’d like to do a step further back.
1) When and why did you decide to attend Yale? There was a specific reason (family tradition, some specialization, …)?
Jimmy and I met at Yale Graduate School of Drama in the Fall of 1964. In my last year at St. Bonaventure University, I was cast as Hamlet by the drama coach, Mr. Nassir who had been a hugely successful drama student at Yale. I had played major roles in “Dramat” productions from my sophomore year with him, and at the same time I began producing & directing my own shows, which won Best Production of the Year three-years-running. Mr. Nassir encouraged me to go to his alma mater for an MFA. In fact, he insisted I go. He called and insisted they take me! I did not have to audition for Miss Welch, the drama teacher there.
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2) Were you already out when you met James?
No, I was not “out” at Yale. However, I had my first serious boyfriend when I was seven and he was seven. We used to go to the kiddie matinees for twelve cents at the Beacon Theater in NYC where I was born. We would hold hands (and other things) under out coats. I loved him and he loved me.
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Enter Jimmy at Yale. When we met, I had never been to a gay bar. I had never tricked. When he told me late Spring 1965 that he was in love, I assumed it was with one of the other guys in our class. I can still see us crossing Chapel Street in New Haven going to my apartment after class having this conversation: Is it Bill? Is it Gary? Who is it?
”It’s you,” he said.
I was beyond stunned. There were no women in my life. There were no men in my life. All of that had been put on hold. I was a spiritual hooker, as I came to call myself. I was the center of the social life of my class at Yale. My apartment was the meeting place. Everyone loved me. Safety in numbers, no? I was offered a beginner’s place in Pearl Lang’s & Martha Graham’s dance companies. I came to hate Yale because the drama teacher was not a fan of my work and was pretty up-front with her rejections. I was contemplating transferring into the Director’s class where I knew I probably really belonged. But, then, Jimmy told me he loved me and I began to look at him in a different way. And then one Saturday morning when my roommate was away, Jimmy boldly slipped into my bed.
Chapel Street
We left Yale and went to the London School of Drama. I was still not fully committed to having a love-life with Jimmy though you would never have known that from the way I behaved with him. We were lovers, passionately and relentlessly and shamelessly physical with one another whenever possible, which was all of the time. I was still not altogether convinced I was gay. Then in Paris–of all unoriginal places!?–I told him while we were walking by the Seine that I had decided I didn’t think a life with him was a good idea. He said okay. He also said goodbye and walked away leaving me standing by the Seine. I followed him back to the hotel and watched him pack his bags to go back to London alone. And then the bubble of denial burst. I began to cry hysterically. He took me in his arms. Boy, did I cry! And what did he say?
“We all have to come out in our own way.”
3) When and how did you meet? Do you remember the first time you saw him?
I definitely remember the first time I saw Jimmy. It was the first class of the first day, which happened to be our acting class. We were sitting in seats in the main theater’s auditorium and he was chattering away with his neighbors. He had bright red hair and was making everyone laugh, completely at ease in his surroundings.
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4) How was your life during college? Were you living in a dorm or wherelse? Were you and James “boyfriends” and if yes, how this affected your life? (it was 1964, was it?)
My life during college was swell except for my sexual abstinence. As I mentioned, I signed up for two majors and one minor. I can still see myself in the Bonaventure gym not able to decide what I wanted to study more: English lit or psychology. I had not wanted to go to college. I fancied going to Manhattan and having a career in Something. I missed the city desperately. I did not play sports. I wanted to learn about cars but I was in a “Double A” class and we were not allowed to take things like “shop” or “mechanics” or “typing.” (Decades later when I worked at The New York Review of Books–which is where Susan Sontag became such a huge part of my life–I remember its editor Barbara Epstein not knowing how to work the phone’s hold button: serious intellectuals were simply not “mechanically inclined.” ) So, I figured typing would help me do Something in Manhattan and I insisted I be allowed to take it because I would need it for working on my college papers. (I got 99 on the New York State Regents in typing, which to the dismay of my teachers revealed I was mechanically inclined as well as not very good with languages. Happily, Jimmy spoke five!)
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5) If I remember well, at the time you wrote Gaywyck, you were already living together. Did you go living together after college? Can you tell us something more about your life at the time? Even simple things like your first home together, your day to day life…
As I’ve said, Jimmy and I met in 1964, became lovers in 1965, and moved to London where we lived in bedsits most of the time. Since so many of our Brit friends were in the theater, our being gay was no big deal. Remember, it was “Swinging London” and men had long hair, wore flower-print shirts from Biba’s, and were looking for adventures of all kinds.
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6) Even if romance is one of the bestselling genre, it’s not considered high literature, quite the contrary. In the '70 I think it was even worst. What was the general reaction among your friends when you decided you wanted to write a Gothic Romance (Gaywyck)?
Alone in that funny, little house on the North Shore I completed the first draft of Gaywyck. By then I knew I wanted to use as many genre devices as I could manage to insert organically, as well as famous quotes from movies and novels and plays–all quotes taken from heterosexual situations, i.e., “I’ve never seen so many beautiful shirts!” from Gatsby. And “Nobody’s ever called me ‘darling’ before,” from Now, Voyagers. In fact, at one point I was stuck; I turned on the TV and there was Charles Boyer telling Irene Dunne to put herself–not him–at the center of her life. Zip it went into the novel at a critical point. “He is ready for a love affair but not for love,” from All That Heaven Allows also came in handy.( read more )
7) If you had to move tomorrow in a very small house, what object of your life together with James you would absolutely want to take with you?
If I had to move into a very small space I would take Jimmy’s 25th anniversary gift to me. It’s a small silver card tray from Tiffany’s with an inscription: Yale Yule 1964 - 1989. Our first Christmas together at Yale I gave him a Zippo lighter inscribed “Yale Yule 1964.” And I’m the so-called romantic? Jimmy is capable of unconditional love, the rarest of gifts to give to anyone.
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8) You and James are living in the Hamptons now, aren’t you? How is your life today, your day to day routine?
Our homes together have always looked alike, no matter the shape or size of the space. Books, books, and more books; books on pretty much every subject. Books, books, and more books. (I’ve just dispatched over 2500 books from my sister’s Long Island basement and about 500 from the New Your apt to New York’s Strand Bookstore, and over 6 dozen to the local library here on Capitol Hill.) And there are still books, books, and more books in both our New York and Capitol Hill apartments. On the phone recently with Fran Lebowitz, I mentioned the books and she said she has over 8000 books in her place: “They are like fruit flies,” she said. “You buy a plum and suddenly you have a house full of fruit flies!” Jimmy recently reminded me: “Books do furnish a room.”( read more )
5 Studs By: B.J. Scott (Beau to Beau Books of Male Love)
5 Studs By: B.J. Scott (Beau to Beau Books of Male Love)