Grief is a funny thing

Nov. 29th, 2025 03:37 am
seapicklesupremacy: Meme of a drawn cat with a blank open-mouthed smile (Default)
[personal profile] seapicklesupremacy
 Intellectually, I know he's gone. This morning I watched his stiff body get carried out from my kitchen to the back of an unmarked white van. I knew that was the last time I'd ever see him in one piece. The last time I'd get to touch his soft fur and bury my face in his mane. My brain knows he's not here anymore.
But it seems my heart is yet to catch up. I walk downstairs in the dead of night and I immediately think "Oh watch out for him at the door" and "be careful not to step on him at the bottom of the staircase". My eyes search in the blackness for that familiar shape, but he's not there. He'll never be there again. That second of pure confusion and then heartbreak is going to linger for a long time. I think I'm always going to have a suspiciously Sam-shaped hole in my line of sight. Just a stark emptiness where he used to be.
Oh, my poor boy. Where have you gone? 
seapicklesupremacy: Meme of a drawn cat with a blank open-mouthed smile (Default)
[personal profile] seapicklesupremacy
Probably one of the least helpful things I'm currently doing to myself is when I'm scrolling through Instagram reels and I see my ex like a reel, I'll check when the post date was just to know they're still...out there? I guess?? Especially if it's something relating to relationships.
I am deluding myself baddddd 😃 They don't want me anymoreeee

Manga Check-in: A-A'

Nov. 28th, 2025 08:30 pm
bluapapilio: an emoji holding a heart that says love (love)
[personal profile] bluapapilio


"A-A'"

Hagio Moto, 1981

MangaUpdates
MyAnimeList

Summary: The story A, A' raises a troubling question: How would you feel if your lover died - and was replaced by a clone? Could you recreate your relationship with someone who was physically exactly the same but didn't share any memories of your life together?

My comments:

First story: Adelade was a young woman of a rare species dubbed 'unicorns' because of their unique hair pattern, who was working on the planet Proxima when she was an in an accident and died. All team members had clones made and put in cold storage for such cases, and her clone is sent back to work, minutes three years worth of memories. We see the team members go from excited that she's back to realizing that she's also back to square one, seeming cold and distant.

This was such a poignant story, this is my kind of tragedy (that feels weird to say). I mean sure the occasional bawl session can be cathartic but stories like this are very touching in a way and so thoughtful. For instance, when Adelade realized she didn't have her scars from when she lost Pony. Yeah it was a tragedy and the scars were a reminder of it but they also were a way for her to remember Pony, and the loss was greatly disturbing to her.

I couldn't decide if Adelade's clone actually remembered anything in the end and why if so but I didn't mind not knowing. I just know clone Adelade and clone Regg will be okay even if things won't be exactly the same.

Adelade and Regg are the two on the cover.

Second story: Mori is part of an experiment on telekinesis. He lost full control over his powers after being kidnapped as a child for having a genetically modified 'kaleidoscope' eye. Trill is a maladjusted girl of the unicorn race who somehow makes Mori's powers stable.

Since unicorns were made specifically to handle space and work with computers, they supposedly don't have much emotion. As we can see from the first story, they just show and feel emotions differently, and those willing to be patient can become close to them.

Mori and Trill resonate with each other, and Trill's emotions flow freely again. The doctor taking care of Trill was using her eggs to try to make more like her, because he believed people should get rid of their emotions. He didn't like when she got her emotions again and hurt her. In her rush to get back to Mori, tragedy strikes.

Sadder than the first story but again, very poignant. I didn't like the story much at first but like any good story, it was good at making me invested over time. Mori forcefully grew up a lot by the end, it's just a shame Trill wasn't able to live on and continue her own growth journey.

Third story: Tacto is a unicorn who finds out that he has female sex organs. He isn't much bothered by it and immediately decides to get them removed, but his current guardian An-An wants him to fully develop them to become a woman and get pregnant.

When Tacto was young, his mother committed suicide, and it traumatized him so badly his father erased his memories before age 7, causing Tracto to have to relearn everything. Tacto later left to work on a project and the two are estranged, but An-An thinks he can convince Tacto to become a woman.

On Mars Red, Tacto's team runs into kite flyers - and one of them is Mori! It's been four years since Trill died and Mori is still feeling the loss. Having another unicorn with the same hair and eyes brings it up again.

I was really worried this was going to be like 'Tacto falls for Mori and changes his mind about being a woman' but not at all. It turns out Tacto's father made something that can change genders by accident and used it on himself, temporarily turning himself into a woman*. His colleague really wanted to try it, but it seemed to permanently change him, then the two got married and had Tacto. Something about being pregnant made him change back into a man, that and the father cheating made him so depressed he committed suicide. Tacto was born with the same makeup, he too will change into a woman soon.

At first, Tacto was with a girl named Merimé because 'he liked her red hair' (it was dyed but the same color as Tacto's hair marking). She wanted to be with him for prestige. Mori won him over with his kites, saving him and resonating with him. If the relationship is going to work in the long run, they're going to need to learn patience and how to communicate properly.

The art is very much my thing. The characters are so diverse. I want to know a physical English copy of this so bad but it costs...a lot. I've added a few other things by Hagio to my TBR but I'm afraid nothing will measure up to how much I enjoyed A-A'! I'm giving it a 10/10 not because it was perfect or because I liked everything but because there were so many aspects of it that touched me. This is how you write situations and characters that aren't necessarily likeable but that win you over.

I can be picky about humor and while this isn't a comedy or anything, I loved the bits of humor in it.

I really want to read more stuff like this. Space, genetic modification, terraforming etc.

* Obviously changing into a body with different sex organs doesn't mean you're suddenly a man/woman

Content warnings:

-Death of lover including finding their body later
-Cloning, human experimentation, genetic engineering
-Death of a pony (not shown, but the grief is there)
-Attempted rape (on top of the 'taking Trill's eggs and inseminating them' experiment)
-Suicide, alcoholism, cheating, dysphoria (Tacto's mother)
-Attempt to make a character transition into a woman because they're discovered to have ovaries
-Childhood trauma
-Death & grief


My rating: 10/10

November+ Asian Drama PTW

Nov. 28th, 2025 06:35 pm
bluapapilio: The Sleep of Reason Produces Monsters (sleep of reason)
[personal profile] bluapapilio
Using my Asian drama boardgame.

I completed 6/6 from my last challenge and I DNF'ed one of them. I'm too tired to care what I get this time let's just do this lol

Avatar: Supernatural (Guardian)
Skill: Move two extra tiles once (trap tile if Even)


Roll #1

A 9, prompt: rivals to lovers. Ughh why do people have to lump rivals to lovers, hate/dislike to love and enemies to lovers together, they're all different things! And why is it so hard to search by tag in MDL? Anyway Not Me is tagged rivals to lovers though not sure why as of yet.

Roll #2

A 7 and the trap tile. I was able to roll Even for my skill. New roll is a 6: prompt: favorite genre. I only have one real fantasy on my watching list and that's Love Between Fairy and Devil.

Roll #3

A 10 and 'generate from PTW list' tile. #26 which a GL called Blank, it's in the same world as GAP. This will be my first GL focused drama!

Roll #4

Aand a 12 and the end. Reward: A Tale of Thousand Stars!

Where to watch:
Not Me
Blank
LBFaD


Asian Drama PTW List:

[BL/Action Thriller] Not Me
[Fantasy/Romance] Love Between Fairy and Devil
[GL/Romance] Blank
[BL/Romance] A Tale of Thousand Stars
bluapapilio: conan from detective conan yawning (dcmk conan yawn)
[personal profile] bluapapilio

Episode 5:
They meet and talk with the other train car group. Supposedly, the guy who stabbed Kato was just scared and he apologized, but what about the article about the train killer then?

The leader of their group found a radio in an old ship and managed to talk to someone in Canada who explained that three years after their disappearance, space debris hit an asteroid, changing it's course and hitting Earth. The leader wants them all to work together to figure out how to get back and warn everyone.

Yonezawa pretended to be with Hatano after some guys from the other group acted weird about her. Kayashima was displeased.

We get a little more backstory on Rena. Her parents were always fighting about money and it made her resentful and angry at them and the world. She's happy to be away from all that and doesn't want to find a way back.

Kayashima continues to be his pessimist self about their chances, but he's not wrong that they need to stay grounded and cautious. Meanwhile his little brother stole cash from the salon lady helping him. 😭

The bath scenes haha. I'd prefer a shower. That Akashi is cute.

Kayashima reassuring Hatano about Yonezawa even though he likes her. And I'm confused about that okonomiyaki lady.

'Mrs. President' is nice, I'm glad she's doing okay now.

Tanaka continuing to be a rat, not surprised. *smh*

Rena and Hatano stumble upon a buried dead body with blond hair just as Tanaka's reading the newspaper article about the killer having blond hair. Rena escapes but Hatano gets trapped with them, ending with her jumping off a cliff...

Oh yeah, what is the stones about? Are they pieces of the asteroid?

Grief won't leave me alone

Nov. 28th, 2025 05:09 pm
seapicklesupremacy: Meme of a drawn cat with a blank open-mouthed smile (Default)
[personal profile] seapicklesupremacy
Two weeks ago, I was celebrating my 6 month anniversary with my girlfriend and I had a somewhat-healthy active dog. This week, I have an ex that refuses to talk to me and a dead dog cooling on my kitchen floor.

I am having the worst fucking 2 weeks of my life. 

Ao3 Fic Meme ✨

Nov. 28th, 2025 11:13 am
temris: (kiryu haruka)
[personal profile] temris
Grabbed this from [personal profile] tinkaton, and I love looking at things like these, so let's see!

Go to your Works page on AO3, look at the tags, and see what the answers to these questions are. (Or any other site that has tags)
Results )

Happy Thanksgiving

Nov. 27th, 2025 11:01 pm
cornerofmadness: a scarred young man wearing a santa hat (Default)
[personal profile] cornerofmadness






For those celebrating, I hope you had a good holiday. Me, I went to this...I don't want to call it a soup kitchen per se, free community meal? Mostly it's there and free for the students who can't go home and for townspeople who can't afford it etc. Helped out. Had lunch of well stuffing and cake and a bit of turkey. the rest is...not to my taste but that's okay. Can't complain about free.

Came home, didn't clean. Wrote some. Did book reviews I forgot to do. Made pumpkin soup, stuffin muffins and threw the rotisserie turkey breast in the oven. Not a bad meal at all.

I have Free HBO, Starz etc this weekend. Have recorded the new Superman movie and 5 episodes of It Welcome to Derry so there's that.

Hope you all had a nice day. I'm thankful for my friends in RL and online.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Nov. 27th, 2025 03:45 pm
la_samtyr: grapes to be harvested (Dorwinion grapes)
[personal profile] la_samtyr
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Game Check-in: Duet Night Abyss

Nov. 27th, 2025 12:59 pm
bluapapilio: vita from duet night abyss (dna vita)
[personal profile] bluapapilio

Major spoilers!

Mors looks a lot like Vita and I think they have the same VA, and there was that tale of the Gods coming down and their souls. Is the God of Calamity's soul in Mors?

I played the whole Mors section in one go and my brain is fried nowww. Did Avar really tell Fulvis the location?? He had to know what kind of person Fulvis was and so he wouldn't let him live. And the whole thing with Daphne ughh. I hate the Legion but some of them have parts that I can empathize with.

Vergilius has pretty eyes.

WTF was that Hive Mind entry in the sewers?! Eyes blank and pale as moonlight... Edit: Was that Subject 36 or 47?



[...] past battles we were never at the front — we lost more often than we won, He must have longed for a chance to prove himself... So I signed up too — just to help him chase that dream of being a true Knight: As long as we stick together, it doesn't matter where we go."

You reach the final page.

"O silent gods — if, as Milton believed, Your gaze is truly upon us... then I beg You: grant me one last mercy."
"Let my soul be reunited with theirs,"
'"Then I will forgive You — Your indifference, Your cruelty: I will forgive every trial You set before us, every lie You wove."
"My wings no longer need the radiance of the full moon, I ask only for a soft wind, to bear me home — to where they wait."

Did this Mystic Maze story have to be that sad? Holy moly. Edit: they're all that sad 🙃 Dead group of friends who doesn't know they're dead yet and keeps trying endlessly... I wonder if Milton is a reference to Paradise Lost?

Chapter 3: I KNEW one of those monsters was Blues, too much foreshadowing. :| Man this game has such dark stories. Does this happen to all Laurelled Charon?? Are they made as weapons of war or another purpose? ...Now I understand why Lynn made Rhythm leave even though the "monster" who got hurt was still alive. She knew about the experiments and was probably ordered to retrieve it. This story made me cry so much. At least they died as humans and not as lab experiments in captivity...

I bawled my eyes out by the end. The last part with Phantasio with the singing was beautiful but DEVISTATINGGG. It's a miracle I got through the fight while crying and trying to listen to the music. And I just realized Blues and Phantasio won't get the proper Charon burial rights like Psyche got. 😭 

Too Many People

Nov. 26th, 2025 11:21 pm
cornerofmadness: a scarred young man wearing a santa hat (Default)
[personal profile] cornerofmadness
Just everywhere but the laundromat. Did I mention the assholes broke both washing machines here and I had to go to my old one in Jackson. Well...I won't bitch about the time i had to go to the one in Gallipolis last month. Holy shit, 10$ to do two loads of wash and one full dryer (I hang a lot of my good clothes).

This put me in mind of something [personal profile] evil_little_dog posted the other day about how expensive it is to be poor. Which is 100% accurate. Like now that I'm not sure I can buy a new car (or newer I should say) but mine has 111K on it. If I don't, something is going to blow and it'll be expensive to fix. I CAN afford a laundry suit for home (but the hook up is fucked up) but imagine doing a WHOLE family's laundry at those prices because you can't afford a washer/dryer. Jesus. (it's much cheaper here at the apt)


The coffee shop was packed. I did get a spot, talked to former students, thought about exploding the heads of the adult son/mom combo who was letting their 3 year old daughter/granddaughter run everywhere for the full hour I was there (and they were there before me) She was nearly hit by the door multiple times and nearly took out the waitresses more than that. eye rolls.

Kroger was predictably packed. I have to make cookies for a giveaway but found out my baking powder smelled like ass so I had to go get more. Like the Hunger Games in there. How many people wait to the last second to buy things (asks the idiot who also forget eggs and milk for her baked goods. I had...the lemon. Whee)



They were also beginning to pull down one of the historic buildings today. I got pictures (It was beyond saving which is sad)

I managed to finish a second [community profile] fandomtrees don't get too excited. This was a rec one. Easy peasy.

I'm not looking forward to tomorrow. The temperature fell like a rock today but could be worse. I see what's coming to places I used to live (Lake Erie beach side, Wisconsin). But my issue is a tickle in my chest that says let's get sick. Shut up lungs. Go be weak on your own time, not mine. And my lower left wisdom must be lonely missing its upper wisdom buddy because the entire gum is swollen and painful. Exactly what you want the day before a big meal.


What I Just Finished Reading:


The Tea Dragon Society - very sweet


Revenge Serve Royal - historical mystery, it was pretty good. Found out I read book one and this is book three. Guess who didn't read book 2


What I am Currently Reading:


A Twist of Murder - Charles Dickens is the detective, yes another real person fanfic mystery. So far I am unimpressed.

Death at the Door

Wyches - a graphic novel horror I got from the library today


What I Plan to Read Next: Haunted Cemeteries of Ohio

Where in the world is Catherine?

Nov. 26th, 2025 03:17 pm
catherineldf: (Default)
[personal profile] catherineldf
An endlessly valid question these days. I am not wearing a striped shirt (one has to have standards), but I have been a. Wrestling with Hell Cold for weeks now and b. Piling on all the events I can get into because no day job and c. Wrangling my data analytics class, Queen of Swords Press stuff, writing, job hunting and sundries.

Some things have begun to dawn on me, albeit quite slowly. I'm unbelievably burnt out. Objectively, I knew this, but I'm starting to reckon with the fact that 5 years of nonstop stress and 60-70 hours week have...dented me pretty badly. The last year of deranged boss and constant threat of being fired did not help either. Add to that my age, my cat who needs medical attention and feedings which require me to be at home (even if I wanted to go back to the cube farms) and the IT job market tanking and I'm starting to let go of it. I'm going to focus on ramping up the press, reviving my dormant editing business and seeing what kind of other WFH I can scare up here and there. Eventually, Social Security will have to be a thing, but even with Jana's added in, it won't be enough to live on and I'll have to work anyway.

On the jollier side, I'm writing again! I cranked out 1000 words of novel draft last night, the most I've written at one time in a while. I have 2 other projects in progress and am gradually getting some ideas for other things. I'm going to be pitching some talks and classes and articles as well and working on new story collections as well. I just reactivated my Professional Editors Network membership and will be rebuilding my profile in the next few days. I have a new small business mentor with the county and am meeting with her next week. I found a support group for unemployed older women and will meet with them next week.

And Queen of Swords Press has a terrific new gay vampire novel by M.Christian out and we'll be releasing an omnibus edition of the Astreiant Series by next month on 12/15! The Complete Astreiant by Melissa Scott and Lisa A. Barnett is up for preorder now (please buy direct from us if you can; Amazon is going to crush us on their percentage for this book). The Astreiant Series is also eligible for the Best Series Hugo this year, so please keep it in mind when you are nominating. Melissa Scott has never won a Hugo and I'd love to change that.

Queen of Swords Press is also WisCon's Vendor of the Month for November so if you buy a backlist title (not the preorder) from us using coupon code WisCon26 at checkout, you get a sale price and we'll donate $ to the con. The proverbial win/win!

I'm adding Jana's boxes and journals to the shop on Ko-fi, along with some of my own projects and offerings. Please feel free to boost if the shopping aspects won't work for you.

More bulletins soon! Have a great holiday if you're celebrating! I'm going to veg out with my kitties and do some writing and editing, before enjoying a good takeout meal from the co-op. I'm booked every waking moment Friday, Saturday and part of Sunday so please don't worry that I'm being left to weep alone into my cranberries. I'm deliberately choosing to have a day off. :-)

My students were testing me today

Nov. 25th, 2025 11:29 pm
cornerofmadness: a scarred young man wearing a santa hat (Default)
[personal profile] cornerofmadness
It was an easy open study lab today and they were playing music when one of them pipes up, do you like music Doctor Evans?

Yes, I love music. Feel free to play it.

Girl from the back. Did you listen to Jacob Sartorius? (her table had suggested it last week when they were using him to remember the sartorius thigh muscle)

Yes, I liked it.

What did you listen to?

Ladies it's been a week, I don't remember.

Guy from the front - Do you like rap?

Me - it's not my favorite genre but I listen to some of it.

WHO?!?

Me - Oh, they're all old now. Run DMC, Will Smith when he was the Fresh Prince, Sir Mix-a-lot, Tone Loc

Guy from the front - do you like Nas?

Me - I've not really heard his stuff but I like Little Nas X

Them- holding up phone, what's this one? (obviously thinking Doc Dana is trying to be the cool prof who knows music)

two notes

me - Old Town Road, Little Nas X and Billy Ray Cyrus

they start giggling. loudly.

The phone goes up. More music.

Me -three seconds in, Get Jiggy with it, Will Smith

More giggling.

Them - Dance

Me - Just play your music.

They weren't sure if it was a dare or not so the phone went away.


We had some of the other testing too. It's week 15 of 16 after all. Can't I have extra extra credit. No.

I NEED to pass this class to graduate. Can't I have a D? I'm desperate. 1. that's not passing 2. You have a 38%. No. I mean you'd have to sacrifice to the elder gods to pass at this point.


Let's hit the fannish fun for fannish 50 For one, sharing this again because Blake and this song hit the Billboard top 100 (at 98 but my god it's less than 3 minutes) Also move over Jessica Rabbit, another animated lounge singer is after your crown




Finally getting my thoughts out on the last two Hazbin episodes. Spoilers abound and outside of the above song all the clips and songs are NSFW )

November+ Movie PTW List

Nov. 25th, 2025 09:46 pm
bluapapilio: The Sleep of Reason Produces Monsters (sleep of reason)
[personal profile] bluapapilio
Using my movies boardgame.

I completed 6/7 movies from my last challenge. I DNF'ed the one. I rated them all pretty good, with two of them over 4 stars!


Avatar:


Romance (Imagine Me & You)
Skill: beat the trap tile once (roll a prompt)

Roll #1

I better get the trap tile since I finally got that skill! First roll is an 8, right past it though. Generate a random movie from my list. #64 which is a thriller/horror movie called Dagon!

Roll #2

A 7, prompt: comedy element. Welcome Week: A College Horror Anthology.

Roll #3

A 4, prompt: highest rated on PTW. Se7en, a mystery/thriller from '95 that I watched part of already before.

Roll #4

A 6 and the PTW tile again. #23 which is 1999's Sleepy Hollow,

Roll #5

A 7, prompt: weapon on the cover. So many options. Let's go with She Came from the Woods.

Roll #6

An 8 and the end. I didn't even get to use my skill... Reward, uhh. Oh, Black Phone 2

Lots of horror/thriller. Horror is somehow (usually) easier for me to watch when I'm tired so this is fine.




Movie PTW List:

[Thriller/Horror] Dagon ✔️
[Comedy/Horror] Welcome Week: A College Horror Anthology ✔️
[Mystery/Thriller] Se7en ✔️
[Mystery/Horror] Sleepy Hollow ✔️
[Horror] She Came from the Woods ✔️
[Horror/Thriller] Black Phone 2 ✔️

November+ TV Show PTW

Nov. 25th, 2025 08:39 pm
bluapapilio: Bakugou, Todoroki and Midoriya from Boku no Hero Academia (BnHA BakuTodoDeku)
[personal profile] bluapapilio
Using my TV Show PTW boardgame.

I completed 4/4 from my last challenge, I was a little slow because I find it hard to watch things when I'm tired, but I did them all so 👍.

Avatar: The Owl House/Animation (re-roll dice once)


Roll #1

A 5, prompt: shortest on list. Ninjago season 6, I should be able to finish it if I'm in the mood.

Roll #2

A 10, prompt: longest titled which is Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug & Cat Noir, it looks like new episodes have came out since I last watched.

Roll #3

A 4, prompt: featuring a group of friends. Maybe it's because it's my avatar for this challenge but my mind immediately jumped to The Owl House,

Roll #4

An 8, cover featuring mostly blue. I guess She-ra?

Roll #5

A 6, generate from PTW list tile. I've been putting it off but I'll go for Lost in Space (season 3).

Roll #6

A 10 and the end. Didn't get a chance to use my skill;; Reward: Helluva Boss. I think as soon as I catch up on that I'll start on Hazbin Hotel when I get a chance.

Where to watch:
Ninjago
Helluva Boss



TV Show PTW List:

[Superhero/Animation] Ninjago
[Superhero/Animation] Miraculous Ladybug ✔️
[Fantasy/Animation] The Owl House
[Fantasy/Animation] She-ra
[Sci-Fi/Drama] Lost in Space S3
[Multi-Genre/Animation] Helluva Boss

🔊 Daily music

Nov. 25th, 2025 12:31 pm
bluapapilio: headphones connected to a heart (listening pleasure)
[personal profile] bluapapilio

If this world is wearing thin
And you're thinking of escape
I'll go anywhere with you
Just wrap me up in chains
But if you try to go alone
Don't think I'll understand
🎤
Ghost ft. Patrick Wilson - Stay

Hopeless Feeling

Nov. 24th, 2025 11:14 pm
cornerofmadness: a sad anime character (depressed)
[personal profile] cornerofmadness
So out of 70+ faculty the same 21 people who do everything are the only ones who voted and four more voted to take the insurance that means we lose our doctors, our HSA, to save 100$/month but has a 9K deductible vs the 3K we had and oh the insurance is under major investigation by the federal government for fraud. Thanks for voting to make sure we're one health crisis away from homelessness there. But also the rest of the faculty, why are you not helping? Do you all have spouses with better insurance? Are you on medicare? Any good reason you weren't there for us?

But I was trying to find a little joy in the day and I did get paid for my short story today. That's great. I've been waiting for MONTHS on this, literally at least 6 months and I've been wondering when we were going to market it. Turns out next month and it'll be out in January.

In the opposite of joy my gastric paresis is acting up so bad. Ate and apple, puked in my office trash can and then my blood sugar dropped out because lunch was in the trash. F.U. life.

But in better news, the blood from my dexcom wasn't from infection. The skin had broken down under the glue so it's getting a rest.


Music Monday, prompt - a song that tells a story. Oh there are OH so many.

this Abney Park one isn't a happy one per se. Robert hasn't talked much about it but some of his stories and songs suggest he grew up in an abusive situation



And Reba had a lot of them. This one had me writing some romance story about a guy named Chance Deveroux back when I was in college but I never finished because I was told guys can't be part of the main focus of a romance. It had to be all the woman's pov (I know better now of course but it was most likely a horrible story anyhow)

FIC: Border Port (Tempestuous Tours)

Nov. 24th, 2025 12:27 pm
duskpeterson: The lowercased letters D and P, joined together (Default)
[personal profile] duskpeterson

Some elders of the borderland still remember the months in 949 when Daxis's Border Port was crowded with war refugees, caused by the outbreak of war between Koretia and Emor.

For a place of somber history, Border Port is an exceptionally cheerful town. Border Port is the only port in the borderland, though you can easily journey to the borderland from points north and south. Disembarking at Border Port, however, places you immediately into one of the liveliest locations in the borderland.

"Lively" is a euphemism for "rowdy." Do not – I repeat, do not – wander here unescorted if you are a woman. Families with small children will probably want to pass through this town quickly, taking overnight accommodations elsewhere.

Unmarried men, however, are likely to enjoy their visit. Sailors have long made this town – one of the oldest ports in the Great Peninsula – their place for recreation. Daxions have happily met their needs. In this mild climate, entertainment is year-round and usually takes place on the streets. Daxion bards sing on every corner, Emorian jugglers stand in every doorway, and Koretian dagger-throwers lay claim over every handy wooden wall. Look out for the last; dagger-throwers don't offer warning before they throw.

Many of these entertainers will have bowls at their feet. These are for coins or – if you do not yet possess peninsularean coinage – for gifts of food. Be generous in your offerings; bards in particular are inclined to offer commentary on stingy listeners, in the form of excruciatingly derisive ballads.

"But what about the women?" Many a northern mainlander has asked me that question. Houses of prostitution are indeed abundant in the Border Port. I mention this, not in order to encourage this distasteful trade, but because these houses are often overlooked by mainlanders who come to the Great Peninsula in search of wives. See the section on courting for more information.


[Translator's note: Readers can take a trip to Border Port in Death Mask.]

Writerly Ways

Nov. 23rd, 2025 10:55 pm
cornerofmadness: (writing king1)
[personal profile] cornerofmadness
Today was hard, tomorrow will be worse. Fully expecting to be yelled at but I don't regret posting the the union all the DOJ investigations into the shit insurance we're voting on. So enough of that. Let me get into the writerly ways.

One of the reactors for Hazbin Hotel was ranting about 'forced conflict' and I'm like that is a great term for it and I do hate that writing...shortcut? Trope? I'm not sure what I want to call it. Basically, characters X &Y act (often out of character) in a way that most people would not do and it ends up creating drama and conflict that we otherwise wouldn't have and don't necessary need.

I'm sure this has been happening forever. But the first time I remember ranting about it was way back in the heyday of Buffy the Vampire Slayer when Xander purposely doesn't tell Buffy that Angel's soul could be/was being returned. At least that example has a reason. Xander is a jealous douche.

Later in the same verse we have much less of an excusable example is in Angel S4 with Connor. When the whole team knows that something is wrong with Cordelia and they set out to prove it, Angel excludes Connor rather than keeping him close so he could see for himself that Cordelia is being influenced. Because Connor isn't there in the beginning he believes the team is attacking Cordy for no reason. There was no reason to force this conflict and it made the team look like a team of morons.

Oh I know why it was done. Joss was punishing Charisma for getting pregnant and wrote the world's stupidest story line to make her look bad (she is now freely talking about how much of a piece of shit he was to her) but at the time we didn't know this and it felt like bad writing.

Where this came up in Hazbin was Charlie, the pollyanna of the group, sees her father's big secret exposed to all of hell and rather than comfort him for the torment he just endured she tears him a new one for destroying her dreams on purpose (he didn't know Vox had found his secret out and had gone to stop him for his daughter's sake) and when Vaggi mentions she had asked Lucifer to help, this out of character ire is turned on her for the better part of two episodes. The fans did not react well and as far as I'm concerned, we shouldn't. There was still an opportunity for Charlie to be mad b ut maybe mad for the right reasons. Sigh.

So have you written this? I try hard not to. Have you come across it and been disappointed by that turn of events? Or did you like it?

Open calls


The Faerie Cat Volume 3
Fantasy, speculative fiction, and horror, especially those steeped in Celtic mythology or featuring the Fair Folk

Adventitious Issue 1 Stories that offer a surprise and sense of wonder through their language, characters, plots, or all of the above

The Phantom Pulse 2026 First Window speculative fiction of the grey corners of humanity, dread that permeates the skin, and the bizarre

We’re Here: The Best Queer Speculative Fiction 2025 Queer short fiction reprints from 2025

Shift: Now Seeking Submissions

30 Magazines Accepting Genre Fiction






From Around the Web


Charting Your Course #2: Self-Publishing in 2025

How to Maximize Book Pre-Orders (Even With a Small Audience)

Creating Low Points for Your Protagonists

these next four are from [community profile] ushobwri

Character backstory tips for better writing

A Writer’s Comprehensive Guide to Backstory.

8 Dos & Don’ts of How to Write Sex Scenes That Work


Five Principles For Writing Kick Ass Action Scenes




From Betty

Mining Off-Stage Movement

Five Popular Tropes Writers Struggle With

Pacing Your Dialogue

Five Problems With Focusing on Internal Conflicts

Six Tricks for Memorable Character Moments

Should Your Romance Be Single or Dual POV?

How to Edit Emotion in Romance & Women’s Fiction

The Plunge

Make the Most of Your Manuscript’s Resting Time

Coping Mechanism Thesaurus: Spending Time in Nature

You're Writing a Book. So Stop Writing a Movie.

How To Be An Author: What's Your Next Book About?

Find and delete these phrases from your novel

Redshirts

Creating Low Points for Your Protagonists

Insights into the Shape of a Scene

Microtension – A MUST in Your Fiction

Charting Your Course #2: Self-Publishing in 2025

The Art of Intimacy in Writing

Living, Breathing Characters

Is Your Writing “Good Enough” to Publish?

8 Qualities that Will Help Your Protagonist on Their Journey

Be careful setting children’s books in the recent past

How to Get Your Blog Posts Found in AI Search (Not Just Google)

Write With Imagination: How to Stay True to Your Voice and Avoid Predictable Stories
bluapapilio: Azul, Jsde and Floyd from Twisted Wonderland (twst idoazu)
[personal profile] bluapapilio

Chapter 5.1:



It would be a lie to say I wasn’t flustered by this. But whether it was from seeing his bare chest or from Shylock’s natural sex appeal, I wasn’t sure.

*waggles eyebrows*

Chapter 5.2:

Nero on wizards: “Maybe they just want a bit of the things we take for granted, like…appreciation and compassion. Stuff like that.”

Lol I don't know if he was being sarcastic in this convo but he was spot on.

Ughhh Riquet and that slimy priest. I really hope we see Riquet change.

Chapter 5.3:

Poor Chloe having to deal with Rustica and his search for this 'bride'...

Chapter 5.4:

Rustica: “I’ll enjoy anywhere I go as long as you’re with me, Chloe.”

Then stop causing him problems. 😭

Wait, Rustica said the moon chose them, but it's the Great Calamity, right? Why is it choosing people to fight against it??

Chapter 5.5-5.6:

I like the Southern Country people!

The chosen South wizards realizing that means the four wizards sent last time were killed. :'(

Ughh nothing better happen to these guys. >.< And the North wizards better not pick on them, either!!

Chapter 6.1:

Akira: (I can’t even imagine what it’s like. They’ve just been living their lives normally but now they’re suddenly expected to save the world.)

Exactly, and there's a high chance of dying.

The 'I've just changing' scene makes me think of fem!Akira. It's almost like they're going back and forth on how they depict them.

Chapter 6.2:

Man you know you fucked up if you piss off Heathcliff. 

Shylock: “It doesn’t matter what we do, Heathcliff. No matter what we sacrifice, no matter how much we smile and try to play nice—”

Shylock: “—We will forever be their enemies, simply by virtue of possessing a power foreign to them. Stronger than them.”

😭😭😭

Chapter 6.3:

Okay maybe Heathcliff is just a hot-head in certain situations.

Apparently Bradley is the leader of 'the deadliest bandit gang in the world'.
bluapapilio: conan from detective conan yawning (dcmk conan yawn)
[personal profile] bluapapilio

I think the cover image was taken from some other source, maybe another webnovel, and made into a cover for Jubo but I couldn't find the true original source.

Chapter 1: Wang Cheng grew up in a temple, it was just him and his master until he passed away, leaving the old and worn down temple and deed to Wang Cheng.

Chapter 2: Wang Cheng was given up at age seven by his parents because they had a daughter and couldn't afford three kids. Wang Cheng never got to eat his fill as a growing teenager because he lived with the monks, so his mom tries to make up for it when he visits. His parents want him to move back in with them now instead of living alone in the old temple.

Chapter 3: developers took fancy of Shiquan County and wanted to build a large tourist resort here. Several villages have received the news, and Wang' Village was also included.

Wang Cheng doesn't want to sell the temple, he'd rather rebuild it.

How will turning the area into a tourist trap spot effect the villagers...?

Chapter 4-5: Family dynamics explanations and explorations.

Wang Cheng agreed to move back home so he heads off to get his things.

Chapter 6: Wang Cheng is a really good cook.

The real estate company shows up.

Chapter 7: Wang Cheng will only sell the mountain if the temple isn't demolished. Of course the real estate boss isn't happy about it.

Apparently Wang Cheng is really attractive even bald.

Chapter 8: Wang Cheng is so attractive even his sister blushes at him lol

Seems the family are supportive of Wang Cheng's decision?

I think they're moving to Guan Village, the mom's original village?

Chapter 9: The thing about the hands was interesting, I want to know more.

Chapter 10: I think Chu Yifeng, the real estate boss, is the LI?

Chapter 11: It is pretty interesting reading about the family dynamics.

Can't believe Wang Cheng negotiated 12 months work down to 3.

Chapter 12-13: Aunt Zhang is infuriating. 😡 Good luck finding a worker as good as Wang Ziyu!

Chapter 14 Finally moving away! Cute family interaction there at the end.

Chapter 15-16: Unfortunately two uncles they don't get along with also moved to Guan.

Chapter 17: First day of work, reading a bunch of docs, didn't see Boss Chu.

The editing could use some work but it's readable and mostly understandable. Seems like this will be a day-to-day story with a slow burn.

CW: A woman gets slapped and called a slut (in Wang Cheng's mind) after she hurls insults and abuse at Wang Ziyu.
bluapapilio: stiles from teen wolf flipping through a boo (teenwolf stiles)
[personal profile] bluapapilio

Summary: Cordelia knows her mother is . . . unusual. Their house doesn’t have any doors between rooms—there are no secrets in this house—and her mother doesn't allow Cordelia to have a single friend. Unless you count Falada, her mother's beautiful white horse. The only time Cordelia feels truly free is on her daily rides with him.

But more than simple eccentricity sets her mother apart. Other mothers don’t force their daughters to be silent and motionless for hours, sometimes days, on end. Other mothers aren’t evil sorcerers.

When her mother unexpectedly moves them into the manor home of a wealthy older Squire and his kind but keen-eyed sister, Hester, Cordelia knows this welcoming pair are to be her mother's next victims. But Cordelia feels at home for the very first time among these people, and as her mother's plans darken, she must decide how to face the woman who raised her to save the people who have become like family.

My thoughts: Gripping from the start and stabs you right in the heart with the abuse that Cordelia suffers from her mother. This is my second T. Kingfisher book and I've found her MCs to be relatable to me personally but especially Cordelia. I grew up isolated and unsocialized after a certain point and had trouble with handling strong emotions (still do).

I really think I would give it 5/5 just for the characters but...I had other issues that bring the score down. At times I felt like the pacing was off, but that could be because I was impatient for answers, and there were multiples times where I was like "why didn't/don't you just do X??" but again, could just be me being impatient lol.

What I was hoping for did happen in the end (Cordelia living with Richard and Hester) so I was happy there. Speaking of those two, my heart swooned for them, I'm glad they found a way to be together in the end. There's plenty of commentary on a woman's place in historical society.

Did I mention how much I love the characters?

I LOVED the narration (Zoe Mills).

(PS: Was the butler in a relationship with another man? Jack was it?)

I would definitely reread (listen) to this again.

CWs:
-Child abuse (including taking over their body but neglecting to go to the bathroom or eat at times)
-Off-screen murder and discussion of it, on-screen murder made to look like a suicide
-Gore (a horse's head was cut off, it walks around headless and Cordelia touches the area while riding it, later the horse stomps someone to death, also it bites someone's ear off)


My rating: 4.25/5 (rounded down to 4 on goodreads)

Trying to find little moments of joy

Nov. 22nd, 2025 11:23 pm
cornerofmadness: a scarred young man wearing a santa hat (Default)
[personal profile] cornerofmadness
it's not easy but I have no other path forward because man, the urge to just give up entirely is strong. So today, I went to the holiday market in Gallipolis. So muddy but luckily most of it was inside. I got some more hand lotion I don't really need, cinnamon honey no one needs, kettle corn that will probably break my tooth and tea because I needed more (eye roll) and two very neatly done blind books. She provided the genre/subgenres, goodreads ratings and a decorative front to hide the book. I thought they were cool and if I hadn't already had a lot of gifts for friends I would have bought more.

I went for boba tea only to find the place closed. Not sure why.

Went to Remo's Italian hotdogs for a footlong covered in chili and pickles and since it was packed and I was waiting, there was time for drama. The guy who helps out behind the counter was leaving and he runs back in as two police cars rocket by. 'There's a guy lying in the street I think a car hit him.' Remo is over there saying 'is it someone we know.' Me and another customer, a nurse with Holzer, bust out of the joint, ready got run down the street to help but he had misread the situation. The cops had two men laid out in handcuffs. Things were fine (for us, not so much for those two teens)

Aldi's had all kinds of advent calendars and on an unrelated note I have a chocolate advent calendar now.

Pittsburgh is having so much for the holidays I don't know how I'll get to it all. I plan to try and stave off the insanity that way.

Two more Hazbin Hotel prompts showed up at [community profile] fandomtrees and they were smarter than me. They waited for the season to end to work into their prompts. They're exciting. I need to get started on them. So much I want to write so little time to do it.

Hell it's nearly midnight and I'm just setting down to do anything. So I still don't have my Hazbin break down. Sigh. Haven't read much of anything in weeks.

But have Science Saturday while it's still legal for it to exist (after this week I'm not holding my breath)


Human trash is 'kick-starting' the domestication of city-dwelling raccoons, study suggests

Sunken city discovered in Kyrgyzstan lake was a medieval hotspot on the Silk Road — until an earthquake wiped it out

'Impossible' black hole collision pushed relativity to its breaking point — and scientists finally understand how

Viking Age woman found buried with scallop shells on her mouth, and archaeologists are mystified

Aging Out of Fucks: The Neuroscience of Why You Suddenly Can’t Pretend Anymore (From Betty)

14,400-Year-Old Paw Prints Are World's Oldest Evidence Of Humans Living Alongside Domesticated Dogs

Incredible Footage May Be First Evidence Wild Wolves Have Figured Out How To Use Tools

First-Ever Look At Neanderthal Nasal Cavity Shatters Expectations.

November Anime PTW 2

Nov. 22nd, 2025 04:41 pm
bluapapilio: The Sleep of Reason Produces Monsters (sleep of reason)
[personal profile] bluapapilio
Used my anime TBR boardgame.

I finished 5/6 for my last challenge. Honestly not my favorite challenge, plus when I get a certain amount of exhausted I don't feel like watching anything so that didn't help. I'm hoping for a small list this time or maybe there will be some anime that are easier on me.

Avatar:

Sakura from Wind Breaker
Skill:
Re-draw a prompt once


Roll #1:

An 8, PTW tile. #572 and that iss Trickster: Edogawa Ranpo "Shounen Tanteidan" wow I remember nothing about this but I can see why I added it.

Roll #2:

A 6 aand now the CW tile. #20 which is more Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood.

Roll #3:

A, prompt: reincarnated into another world. Nothing on my CW list for that and I don't want to start something else new, so using skill. New prompt: popular anime. Haikyuu!! ,hopefully I'll be in the mood for it (aka more awake) by the end to watch it.

Roll #4:

An 8, intimidates you. *spends several minute hemming and hawing about what exactly that means* Ya know what, fine, I'll do Mawaru Penguindrum. I don't know how much I'll remember but I refuse to backtrack because I'd probably DNF it due to that character I hate. I may DNF anyway but hey, let's find out at least. 🤷

Roll #5:

A 6, prompt: mystery element. More Delico's Nursery then.

Roll #6:

An 8 and the end. Reward: going to be predictable and go with Dr: Stone again because it never fails to cheer me up.

Most looking forward to: Dr. Stone of course
Least looking forward to: Mawaru Penguindrum

~Anime PTW List~


[Mystery] Trickster: Edogawa Ranpo "Shounen Tanteidan"
[Action/Drama] Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood
[Sports] Haikyuu!!
[Psychological Drama/Mystery] Mawaru Penguindrum DNF
[Fantasy/Mystery] Delico's Nursery
[Sci-Fi/Adventure] Dr. Stone ✔️

Anime Check-in: Dr. Stone S4P2E4-5

Nov. 22nd, 2025 03:35 pm
bluapapilio: senkuu and gen from dr. stone (drs sengen3)
[personal profile] bluapapilio

Episode 4:


SO CUTE 😊

Lol, the watch lady was so nonchalant about being revived.

"Everyone else we've woken up has had a freakish mental attitude."

Yeah but you dressed the lady before reviving her, not poor Joel...

Lmao at Joel not being able to resist using the Medusa.

Poor Armadillo. T_T After getting into The Vampire Dies in No Time especially, thinking of John being eaten is too sad.

I love the chibi of them all on their bikes!

Episode 5: The 'who killed who' and relationship chart hahah, blew Chelsea's mind. And the high five, cute!

Kinda funny to be worrying about Hyouga this late;;

Aw, Tsukasa's expression while eating was so cute. :') He honestly is pretty darn cute when he's being silly.

I am once again overcome with love for these guys. I hope more people can look past Boichi's way of drawing women sometimes to see the amazing writing by Inagaki and the otherwise great art. ❤️️

November Anime Wrap-Up

Nov. 22nd, 2025 03:26 pm
bluapapilio: Idia from Twisted Wonderland (Default)
[personal profile] bluapapilio
Watched ep. 1-2 of Akagami no Shirayuki-hime, it's okay so far.

Watched ep. 1 of Gnosia, it's so intense/suspenseful!! Might have to take it slow.

Watched ep. 1-2 of Magic Kaito.

Watched Dr. Stone S4P2E1-5!! &

I'm putting IDOLiSH7 on hold, I can't stand the feeling of not remembering what's going on when I wait too long to get back to something, so I'll just go to the game for a while and get back to the anime again someday.

Watched 1 episode of Durarara!!.

Game Check-in: Duet Night Abyss

Nov. 22nd, 2025 12:25 am
bluapapilio: vita from duet night abyss (dna vita)
[personal profile] bluapapilio


Spoilers, of course.

The Empire took someone else before and tried to use them but they resisted, so they were killed?

WTF, the story about Miss Hilin and Hamel was so tragic! And what exactly turned him into a monster? Oh shit I just realized that's why it was going for stones so single-mindedly ahhhh.

Yep, so when Charons 'deteroriate' after Awakening they turn into super strong Filthoids. I'm still confused about the connection between Forsakens and Deterioration. How was Hal a Forsaken?

For the Elsa and Annie case, why didn't we have the option to give Elsa the letter from Annie???

'CRAP' WAS CENSORED WTF even IF this was a children's game that would not be?!

Also I find it really sad that they want to take Psyche away to die with them, like at least they didn't kidnap her, they gave her a choice to meet them and yeah Henrik hasn't given them the best impression but her own parents left her with him and it's clear he's trying to help these people, did they ever consider she might want to stay with her guardian in her last moments?

I cannot believe they just assume Henrik was some evil villain killing and controlling Deteriorators based on that tiny shred of info Vita learned. This is so stupid. *smh* Hope they don't do something irreversible.

Me in the middle of feeling bad for Psyche as walks through her visions of the past: "...Wait, why do her parents look like the most generic NPCs ever, did they adopt her??"

I hate the Empire SO MUCH. They think they're the good guys but they're actually the lowest scum. :|

Is the crystal as a cure a loose end? I don't know how I feel about Psyche's ending, I thought she'd die, then I thought she'd live but then she died by killing herself right when she came back to herself. With practice or done sooner, could Vita's Resonance hold Deterioration back or take it away completely?

Outsider mentioned someone else who could use 'this kind of power' who brought blood and chaos and was hanged, was that the person Sybille mentioned earlier?

Am I ever going to understand how catching Geniemons works?? Edit: I missed how to switch to a higher food, I kept using the same one. 😅

After a little while of playing the game, it suddenly doesn't want to let me turn fast, it's almost like slow moon, same when I use my mouse and move it around the screen. Sometimes I have to restart the game because it's hard to fight when you can't turn fast.

I feel really bad for all the stags, every time I'm out exploring with a team they go off and kill them all. 😭

🔗 Links of interest

Nov. 21st, 2025 11:51 pm
bluapapilio: ivan, till, mizi and sua from alien stage watching till draw (alien stage)
[personal profile] bluapapilio
KK-chan is a Girl! - I found her recently and now she's my favorite mangatuber, seeing all the goodies and manga etcis a delight. She reads across the board, maybe mostly BL and shoujo.

Rec-Cember - Post recs in December and tag them! More info in sticky there. You can post to your own journal or the community.

Do you know "Pomegaverse"!?🐶

State of Thai GL - November 2025

The Gay Couple Shonen Jump Suppressed - SKET Dance is one of those manga I saw start publishing and just never got around to reading. I don't know if having this knowledge now is better or worse but I still plan on reading it.

Atelier B/W - Free illustrations in various categories. Menu at top left: Food, Drink, Misc, Animals, Plants, Other. Rules: no commercial use, redistribution, hot linking, otherwise you're good (changing color/size, use on social media/site etc)

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